SURRENDER Portsmouth 3-1 Reading

Portsmouth, a town with a proud military history, will have rarely enjoyed an easier battle victory than this. For the second Premiership fixture running Reading came, saw and didn't fancy the fight and were duly overrun. For the third time in six days we found ourselves 3-0 down and out of the game early in the second half and frankly this increasingly miserable run of form needs to be nipped in the bud very quickly or else the alarm bells will be ringing as long and as loudly as the infuriating bell belonging to the Fratton End trumpeteer.

Reading were never in this game. Portsmouth dominated from the off, the clever Kanu was winning everything in the air and Hahnemann had already got behind a free headed chance six yards out before he conceded the avoidable tenth minute corner which was delivered to the near post. GUNNARSSON got in ahead of Kanu for once but could only succeed in parrying the ball past Hahnemann, 1-0. Reading offered token resistance in response - a Sidwell header dealt with by James and a Doyle flick over - but the best chane in the remainder of the half came when Kanu was allowed to escaped to the byline to pull back for Benjani to fluff his lines in front of the mocking Reading supporters who would have little else to cheer about for the rest of the afternoon.

In the week, the local Portsmouth paper described Reading as "a kitten. Cute and adorable, brimming with enthusiasm.....they're everybody's friend." A very apt summary aside from the enthusiasm bit, which was worryingly lacking throughout. We rolled over and allowed Portsmouth to tickle our tummy despite a brightish opening few minutes to the second half. This miniest of revivals was speyed less than ten minutes into the half however as Reading failed to clear there lines and an accurate cross from that reliable source of assists Sol Campbell was met by the flimsiest of unmarked headers from KANU and the ball glanced past Hahnemann. The pikey home support moronically bayed EA-SAY EA-SAY. Quite.

Reading's decision making throughout was bereft of inspiration, we looked leaderless and bereft of heart. This is not what we have become used to watching over the last 12 months or so and is especially worrying after a fighting start to the season. Coppell has said after the match that this latest setback won't effect his team's confidence but there was something of an air of resignation as Pedro MENDES finished us off with a driven effort from the edge of the area as Reading failed to clear a corner after the hour. Floyd on Football soon used this as cue to depart this wretched venue where we have only ever won twice in 18 league visits, missing a blatant handball on the line from Mendes which preceeded the utter irrelevance of a scrambled DOYLE consolation. They are made of stern stuff in this part of the world, perhaps our team could do with a week of toughening up on the docks.

Reading: Hahnemann, Gunnarsson, Shorey, Ingimarsson, Sonko, Seol (Oster, 72), Sidwell, Harper, Convey (Lita, 72), Doyle, Long (Little, 53). Subs not used: Federic, Bikey.

Floyd's Favourite: The 16:54 from Fratton which took Floyd on Football out of this toilet of a town.

CARLING KOP Liverpool 4-3 Reading

135 years without a competitive fixture against the most successful football club in England and then two turn up at once. Our first ever visit to Anfield for a Carling Cup tie threw up an unlikely thriller which the Premiership fixture in ten days time will do well to better.

Stood in the Arkles pub before the game enjoying a chat with our friendly scouse hosts, Floyd on Football feared the worst. The team line-ups came across the SKY Sports ticker on the televisions in the pub; Liverpool's changed line-up could still boast the likes of Reina, Riise, Agger, Zenden, Sissoko, Pennant, Crouch and Fowler with a substitutes bench including Kuyt and Carragher. Reading by contrast in making 8 changes fielded the likes of Stack and Halls who had frankly failed to impress in their Reading careers so far and an unfamiliar midfield role was given to Andre Bikey! All three impressed in what was a slow burner of a match that will become memorable for all the right reasons after a torrid couple of weeks.

Sinking the traditional pre-match tipple of Guinness (in honour of our Irish contingent, you understand) Floyd on Football belted across the road in teeming rain to the Anfield Road End which housed the Reading supporters expecting to be greeted by a half empty ground. It was pleasantly surprising to see Anfield choc-full and the familiar strains of You'll Never Walk Alone with scarves held aloft made for an impressive sight. This is a football mad city alright and we were never made to feel anything less than welcome by police, stewards and our scouse drinking buddies in the pub.

The first half, for the most part, was less impressive. Both teams struggled initially on a saturated surface although Reading'g unfamiliar line-up began to force a number of corners at the Kop End and as a direct result of one of those flag-kicks Ulises De La Cruz, who enjoyed a far better game than he did against Arsenal, had a range-finder easily smothered by Reina. At the other end Graham Stack moved smartly across his goal to parry a deflected Zenden effort whilst the industrious John Oster saw a cross-shot hacked behind at the end of a smart move with Gunnarsson's header from the subsequent corner failing to trouble Reina. Reading were giving easily as good as they were getting although Fowler served notice of his intentions with an acrobatic effort over the top. Offside anyway.

Floyd on Football was guilty of doing some clock-watching. 42 minutes up on the Anfield score-board and a decent blank-sheet at half time would be more than satisfactory. Yet when the teams trailed off at half time we were 2-0 down; Pennant's through ball found FOWLER who rolled past Stack and a matter of moments later the Reading 'keeper produced a fine parry to deny a Riise stinger. The Reading defence had a Keystone Cops moment, looked at one another and politely waited for RIISE to lash home the rebound. A thoroughly disappointing defecit as we had competed well without overly threatening; Lita was working hard but Shane Long again had the rabbit caught in headlights look about him.

And five minutes into the second half we were staring a bad defeat in the face without ever having played too badly. PALETTA thumped a Pennant corner into the corner of the net with a fine header and it was game over. Not that Reading didn't have chances after this; the disappointing Stephen Hunt was fed with an opportunity ten yards out an an angle following good work by Oster, yet the little Irishman didn't even manage to get the effort on target. His compatriot Shane Long then found himself clear of the last man advancing on Reina only for his second touch to let him down and take the ball tamely wide. A goal did come when Hunt was fouled by Paletta and Glen Little's teasing set-piece was buried by the bruising BIKEY.

This was the signal for the start of a mad last quarter of an hour, as CROUCH rounded Stack for 4-1 with Reading players bitterly arguing a foul on Gunnarsson which later saw the Icelandar substituted with a damaged tooth. Jose Mourinho would have been apoplectic. Still Reading came back, pinball in the box led to the wizard LITA applying a finishing touch after Long, Hunt and then Halls had played flipper. The Reading supporters were by this point on their feet and making a right din, sensing an unlikely comeback which became an outside possibility as Oster set up Little for a cross headed home by LONG as the first in a queue of three Reading players waiting at the far post. Kuyt spanked a stunning effort against the woodwork, but by this time the Liverpool 'keeper was flapping like an injured goose and another bouncing ball across the box was turned fractionally wide of the upright by Ingimarsson as one of three Reading players waiting to put the ball over the line at point blank range with seemingly every Liverpool player back defending.

At the end of four exciting minutes of injury time referee Walton whsitled to signal Liverpool's progress into Round 4 and the Reading supporters showed their appreciation for the belated attempt at salvaging result and looked forward to more of the same kind of hunger with a more familiar line-up in ten days time.

Reading: Stack, Halls, De La Cruz, Ingimarsson, Gunnarsson (Sodje, 83), Little, Oster, Bikey, Hunt, Long, Lita. Subs not used: Hahnemann, Osano, Hayes, Joseph-Dubois.

Floyd's Favourite: Little. He can count himself very unlucky not to be in the first XI. Providing perfect inspiration for Seol to keep his performance level high.

CANNON FODDER Reading 0-4 Arsenal

The newspapers will have you believe that Arsenal were mesmerising on their way to an easy victory and that Reading simply can't live with teams of that ilk. That doesn't quite tell the whole story at the end of a difficult week.

Missing three key first teamers - Murty, Convey and Kitson would all surely have started if fit - exposed our chronic lack of strength in depth and the events of the past week when Chelsea levelled accusation after accusation appeared to rid Reading of the edge that had seen us compete so well in the Premiership so far. Our players seemed afraid to put a foot in and mix it up; this was yet again a case of trial by media as the television cameras descended on the Madejski Stadium yet again and you have to say that the Reading team seemed to be on their very best behaviour.

It would be churlish and a diservice not to pay tribute to Arsenal's quick passing and high tempo which simply destroyed Reading, but equally you must say that our own passing was dire and that service for Doyle and Long was practically zero. Floyd on Football would go so far as to venture that this was the worst Reading performance since the equally shambolic display at Wigan on the final day of the 2004/05 season. That was the last ocassion on which Reading were beaten by more than the odd goal and going by this tepid offering it is a feeling we might have to get used to over the coming weeks until key players come back into the team. Put simply, Reading's brawn just couldn't live with Arsenal's brain.

And it took less than a minute for their philosophical, deep thinking football to penetrate. Fabregas eased past Harper - who like his fellow ex-Arsenal central midfield partner failed to show up for work against his old employers - and his cutback found HENRY who finished typically. Reading, for all their faults yesterday, could never be accused of giving up and almost hit back with a Seol thunderbolt parried by cheap German pornstar Jens Lehmann who had unhelpfully wagged his finger at Hunt as our much-maligned winger dared to come with 2 feet of the grumpy Arsenal shot-stopper. For the rest of a first half which had all the tempo of a pre-season friendly the two sets of supporter entertained themselves by exchanging banter, much of it at the expense of the Chelsea manager who presumably enjoys having his name sung at matches which his own team aren't even involved in.

Arsenal led by two before the break - HLEB on the end of an incisive move to smash a rising drive past Hahnemann - and that was basically that. Reading were shambolic at times with their passing, Ulises De La Cruz was substituted at half time to spare him more embarassment. Shane Long looked little boy lost up front as he gamely chased every long pass down the channels which was seemingly the basis of a so-called Reading game plan. In the middle of the park, Fabregas was given the freedom of Berkshire; a humbling reality check this must have been for one Steven Sidwell who spoke hopefully before the match of one day being an Arsenal player again.

VAN PERSIE finished another flowing move five minutes or so into the second half and as the crowd slumbered through what remained of this bumped-up trianing match the only remaining moment of any real excitement occurred when the otherwise excellent Hahnemann tore out of his to pull down Fabregas as Ingimarsson was caught short for what was an obvious penalty, duly converted by HENRY. Reading stuck at it, which is all you can say positively of our performance and Little and Oster added a late glimpse of some quality but by this stage it was effectively a phoney war. Indeed, it was Arsenal who looked more likely to have the final say, an outstretched Hahnemann arm prevented Rosicky from applying the formality of a finishing touch and was the best of several excellent saves from one of precious few Reading players to distinguish themself.

Reading: Hahnemann, De La Cruz (Gunnarsson, HT), Shorey, Ingimarsson, Sonko, Seol (Oster, 77), Sidwell, Harper, Hunt, Doyle, Long (Little, 73). Subs not used: Stack, Lita.

Floyd's Favourite: Hahnemann. Two or three top draw saves kept the score count down to one hand.

LETTERS RESPOND Sweet FA

Floyd on Football was delighted to hear that Chelsea Football Club will be writing to the FA with their "observations" on the incident during Saturday's match at the MadStad which has left Petr Cech with a fractured skull and facing a long lay-off. In fact, such a good idea deserves to be copied and Floyd on Football have penned a letter of "observations" to the FA in response to Chelsea's outrageous accusations of late, the text of which follows:


Dear Sirs,

I write in response to the unfortunate incident in the opening minute of the Reading vs Chelsea fixture at the Madejski Stadium Saturday 14th October. It is with great disappointment that I note Chelsea Football Club's intention to write to yourselves with their own letter of 'observations' of events on Saturday in response to their own manager's quite disgraceful accusations immediately after the match and as a Reading season ticket holder for ten years and avid follower of the game at all levels I feel compelled to respond to criticisms of our players.

As you are no doubt aware, Reading Football Club has an outstanding disciplinary record in recent seasons which is something that we are proud of almost as much as the success we have enjoyed recently. Over the past two seasons prior to this we have had not one player dismissed in league matches and certainly before Saturday's clash our disciplinary record in our inaugural season in the Premiership had also been outstanding. The player in question, Stephen Hunt, is one who has played more than 50 matches for our club with, as I understand, a mere solitary caution to his name. Having watched the team at home and away in almost every single match last season I can rarely remember Hunt having so much as a foul given against him never mind ever deliberately setting out to injure an opponent as the Chelsea manager so unfairly suggested.

I am sure that it has not escaped your attention that the overwhelming majority of independent media and ex-player pundits have come out in support of Hunt, who himself has written to Cech expressing his regret at the unfortunate injury which is a sentiment shared by absolutely everyone connected with Reading Football Club. Our club has gained a reputation as a forward thinking, progressive and not to mention fair and friendly club in recent times and the conduct of Reading Football Club having been put under the miscroscope so much in recent days since the incident on Saturday is, I am certain that you will agree, beyond reproach. In offering our sincerest best wishes to Petr Cech we also wholeheartedly support our player who has unwillingly become part of an unwelcome media-circus, and I trust as guardians of the game of football in this country you will agree that Stephen Hunt has no case to answer in terms of the frankly slanderous intention that he would have deliberately caused such a ghastly injury.

Yours Faithfully etc.

ROCKY Reading 0-1 Chelsea

Chelsea are conclusive proof that you can buy titles, buy matches and perhaps - on the evidence of the appaling Mike Riley's eccentric whistle blowing last night - referees but you can't buy class; which is something they will never have under their current arrogant regime.

In the end, it took more a twice deflected freekick for 250 million pounds of Chelsea 'talent' to beat our humble, hardworking team assembled for a mere fraction of that price. It was Lidl 0-1 Harrods, beaten but by no means disgraced over 90 minutes of so-called football which more resembled a Boxing match. Chelsea took a narrow points victory after a bruising bloody contest as Reading refused to be knocked to the canvass.

The bloodshed started with the opening exchanges as Steve Hunt chased a ball down the channel and his momentum took him into collision with the Chelsea 'keeper as Petr Cech slid out to take the ball. Hunt appeared to catch him with his knee and subsequent replays showed that, as he was going flat out there was little he could do to avoid what was an accidental impact. Cech ended up Royal Berkshire Hospital bound whilst the Chelsea management threw a hissy strop; Jose Mourinho - little more than a Portuguese Warnock - later accused Hunt of having deliberately crocked Cech, an incidental which the pouting twit suggested "could have killed" his goalkeeper. Steve Coppell, in his wisdom, suggested that he would welcome the FA having a look at an incident which anyone in their right mind could see was a total accident.

Chelsea replaced one expensive 'keeper with another, Cudicini took the gloves and to be totally frank he had precious little to do throughout. Not an awful lot of good football was played in all honesty; Reading were timid in the opening half hour before attempting a few jabs at Chelsea and the reigning champions of the Premiership played patient, tedious possession football unwilling to commit to all out attack throughout. This was far from entertaining fare and the closest we saw to a goal at each end before the stroke of half time were woodwork striking moments from Reading players; Ingimarsson glancing a cross onto his own crossbar and Doyle spinning like a top after good work by Hunt only to see his effort rebound back into play off the upright.

The winning goal and knock-out blow came on the stroke of half time. The wimpy, weedy looking Mike Riley is notorious for giving in to reputation and gave a freekick and a quite astonishing booking to the otherwise immaculate Sonko as fat Frank Lampard went crashing to the ground twenty-odd yards from goal following a collision with Superman's hip. The resultant freekick took two deflections, the last one off stand-in skipper INGIMARSSON who had taken the armband from the injured Murty. Unfortunate for Ivar and even harsher on Hahnemann who was utterly wrong-footed. Chelsea celebrated the goal as if it were the best ever scored and the Reading supporters angrily and loudly begged the question of midweek England flops Lampard and John Terry where were you on Wednesday night? That goal however was enough to give Chelsea the half time lead which they held onto and that was the last we saw from the title-buying champions as an attacking force.

For much of this game it looked like a good Championship side playing a disinterested Premiership team in a cup tie, for Reading put in a gritty and solid defensive performance without looking hugely capable in attack of worrying Chelsea whilst the visitors had precious little ambition to entertain or to attack following the fortunate goal they did score. The second half was, if anything, even more fractious as players squared up to each on more than one ocassion and Jon Obi Mikel was dismissed around the hour mark for hauling back Sonko, advancing from a defensive position. The fuss and bitter complaing which followed one of the precious few correct decisions made by Riley to give an inevitable second yellow summed up much of why the neutral dislikes this bitchy, ugly Chelsea side who win few admirers around europe.

With a man advantage - albeit for a mere twenty minutes before substitute Andre Bikey was dismissed rather fussily for a second booking - Reading pinned their opponents back on the ropes, forcing plenty of corners and peppering the Chelsea 18 yard box with crosses but we missed our talisman in Dave Kitson. Doyle, Lita and later Long worked hard but you felt that John Terry was too often getting a free head to the ball which was constantly pinging into the Chelsea box with what has to be said varying quality. Steve Sidwell fizzed a ferocious effort fractionally wide with Cudicini seemingly beaten but for all our honest endeavour, Reading forced precisely zero saves from three Chelsea 'keepers - the third of whom was John Terry himself for the final thirty seconds of injury time as Cudicini followed his colleague Cech to the RBH after being flattened by Sonko at one of several Reading corners.

Sadly, having knocked-out two Chelsea 'keepers we still had to take an unfortunate defeat on the chin but it was heads held high for us as Chelsea celebrated wildly at the end which can only be seen as a compliment to Reading's spirit, attitude, drive and endavour. There was a flashpoint right at the death as the Chelsea bench mirrored the cheating antics of their players - so brilliantly mocked by the Reading crowd's 'divers' mime - by refusing to return the ball for a Reading throw-in and a seething Kevin Dillon dived in. The incident was unusually well dealt with by Riley in conjunction with his forth official and a member of the Chelsea staff was banished from the touchline. Floyd on Football is only sorry that Jose Mourinho didn't take the hiding he so deserves in the melee.

Reading: Hahnemann, Murty (Bikey, 36), Shorey, Ingimarsson, Sonko, Seol (Little, 64), Sidwell, Harper, Hunt, Doyle, Lita (Long, 73). Subs not used: Stack, Gunnarsson.

Floyd's Favourite: Sonko. Our own heavyweight kept Drogba in his pocket.

PARD LUCK West Ham 0-1 Reading

Hell hath no fury like a football club scorned. It is now almost an unwritten rule of football that ex-Reading managers are doomed to fail miserably when they come up against their former club; Mark McGhee had a wretched record against us, Alan Pardew has come away from the MadStad on both of his return visits thus far with egg all over his face and he could probably see yesterday's defeat for his out of form team coming. Reading have no such concerns and consolidate their top half place with this latest victory.

Whilst we will never totally forget, it becomes much easier to forgive the betrayal of former managers - McGhee and Pardew both owe RFC a great deal for it was Mr Madejski who twice took a punt on untried ex-players with no managerial experience - when their current circumstances are so hilariously dire. Mr McGhee has plenty of time to do the DIY at home these days having been sacked by League One nonentities Brighton last month whilst Pardew might find himself with an ideal opportunity to attend to his backyard which presumably has gone uncared for since put on gardening leave by Reading a little over three years ago when Pards made clear his intentions to breach his contract and move to West Ham.

Quite why the West Ham job was seen by Pardew as a bigger deal is anyone's guess. A club who have always been also rans in terms of the top flight of english football without a trophy to their name in over a quarter of a century, playing in an unlovely, tight ground in a horrible part of London doesn't sound overly appealing. Add to this all the abuse Mr Pardew has taken from the loyal Hammers followers when things were not going as well as expected; as jobs go it sounds about as appealing as being Wolfgang Priklopil's housekeeper. With a new owner waiting in the wings, a pair of misfiring Argentinians struggling to fit in and five defeats on the spin after this latest loss perhaps Pards might reflect that the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

The electrical storm over East London before kick off was perhaps an apt metaphor for this latest thunderous chapter in Pardew's career. Along with almost 3,000 other vocal Royals fans, Floyd on Football took a pre match soaking en route to Upton Park but within barely 90 seconds of kick off we were all shaking ourselves dry again, leaping around with delight as Convey's short freekick was received by SEOL who danced through the puddles like Gene Kelly in Singing in the Rain before unleashing a twenty five yard pearler past the helpless Carroll. Pardew must have felt like a right drip, his reign further undermined in the rain.

West Ham were a shambles in the first half and Reading eased through the opening forty five with Sonko at his imperious best at centre half throwing himself across a sodden pitch to block Konchesky's purposeful run and Hahnemann dealing relatively comfortably with long range efforts which slipped through the mud in front of him. Going forward West Ham seemed laboured; toothless Tevez could only test us from distance and one or two of his efforts came closer to landing in Essex than Hahnemann's net. Pardew's familiar liking for immobile lumps up front can be the only explanation for the inclusion of the quite dreadful Carlton Cole and only the probings of Benayoun and substitute Sheringham really came close to unsettling Reading in the second half.

This was by no means a complete Reading performance; Doyle and Lita seemed to get washed away in the rain and the longer the game went on the more we gave the ball away as regularly as a tax-dodging student handing out flyers. Sheer guts got us through, never more in evidence when Steve Sidwell threw himself at Benayoun's lob to get his ginger nut to the ball with Hahnemann beaten. The ball ended on top of the net rather than nestling inside it and a roar of relief went up from the travelling army who taunted and teased the hapless Pards throughout. The vocal away support also included famous Reading boy Chris Tarrant. Perhaps he could have offered Pardew a lifeline - Pards would probably choose to phone a friend, his good pal Mr Coppell, to ask how one manages to maintain a winning team.

Reading: Hahnemann, De La Cruz, Shorey, Ingimarsson, Sonko, Seol (Hunt, 80), Sidwell, Harper, Convey (Gunnarsson, 77), Doyle, Lita (Long, 66). Subs not used: Stack, Bikey.

Floyd's Favourite: Sidwell. Sodden conditions could not extinguish ginger flame.